Dear soon to be friend Editor

As I was looking into how to and where to send the query letter to the vast big bang world of the literary agents and I felt pretty desperate about it, I did encounter one funny website that receive all type of crazy query letters and from it, I came up with this cover letter.

Dear soon to be friend Editor:
You don't know me and I don't know you but you will definitely know me a lot more if you pick me. Enclosed are the first three chapters plus an outline of my 100,000-word fantasy novel, Adolf Hitler in the marvelous land of Oz. It is a good read and I am pretty sure all the children on earth would want to be in Adolf Hitler's glittery red's shoes and would want to have a red moustache - that is if you publish me.
In addition, I have absolutely no related credentials or experience since this is my first fantasy novel, but on the other hand I will buy you a bottle of the most expensive champagne if you overlook that tiny detail.

I do not enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope because I am pretty sure you won't return my manuscript.
Thank you for considering my 9th marvel of the world. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Miles Bigways

Truly your dear hopelessly dreamer-like borderline desperate wanna-be author

p.s: If you think these are the first 3 best chapters you have read in the last 5 years, wait till you read the rest.

Seriously, I would rather send something funny and off beat and know for sure that even if I didn't get selected, at least I will have make him or her laugh or smile even.